March is over but the mania has yet to begin

I like to think of myself like Wichita State with the possibility to shock the nation.

The thing everyone loves about March Madness and the NCAA Final Four tournament is that you never know what will happen. Every game is anybody's game. Upsets happen. Second half come backs abound.

The fast paced, unpredictability of college basketball make it the best sport ever. Seriously.

Teams recruit, prepare and practice, but come game time anything can happen. There is no rhyme or reason.

This lack of predictability reminds me so much of my journey with bipolar disorder, particularly depression. I try so hard, perhaps too hard, to avoid depression. I workout regularly, and even signed up for a half marathon to give myself that extra jolt of motivation. I cut preservatives (or almost cut preservatives) from my diet. I pray. I shop. I get my hair done.  I spend time with friends and family. I take my meds and eat plenty of fruits and vegetables. I do all of the things that one should do to stay healthy and depression free.

I often feel like depression shouldn't happen to me. I am Kansas against Michigan. I have this game in the bag late in the second half. I should win this.

But just like Kansas, I don't always win the game. Depression over powers me, despite my best attempts, despite all that life has blessed me with.

And who am I kidding. I can't really compare myself to Kansas basketball.

I'd love to have the humor and wit of Anne Lamott and Tina Fey or the character development of Joyce Carol Oates. Those three writers are the caliber of Kansas basketball. I'm more like Wichita State, someone most people have never heard of but who has the potential to shock the nation in the big dance.

Of course, in my case the big dance isn't basketball it's simply life. And we already know that Wichita State didn't beat Louisville. They won't be national champions this year, but they did shock the nation and make it to the Final Four.

The Shockers success gives me hope in my own ventures. I think I do have what it takes to overcome these bouts of depression- the support, the proper medication, the will power. I think I'll get through these ups and downs.

And who knows, I might pull a Wichita State along the way, and write something spectacular that will shock the nation. I believe it's possible and it's not mania talking.